Me, Myself & My Best-Self

Reflection: A Game Changer for Mental Clarity

• Claire Bennett • Season 2 • Episode 2

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Reflection is a powerful tool for personal growth that offers clarity and insight into our daily lives. By taking the time to reflect, we can identify what works, what drains us, and where we can create balance and joy.

• Reflection serves as a method to create clarity in our lives 
• It helps in recognising both wins and stressors 
• Boosts self-awareness and emotional intelligence 
• Reflection provides space to let thoughts unfold without judgment 
• Identifying energisers and drainers is key to managing energy 
• Practical reflective questions guide personal insight 
• Setting aside time for reflection can transform perspectives 
• It encourages gradual change and resilience 

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Speaker 1:

Hey there and welcome back to Me, myself and my Best Self. I'm Claire Bennett, your host, and I'm happy you're here for episode two. If you're new, welcome, get comfy. And if you tuned in last time, I love that you're back for more. Today we're diving into the first step of the real life coaching framework reflect and reframe, specifically the reflect part. Think of it as the ultimate me time, but with a little extra purpose. You know, like when you stare out the window with your coffee, deep in thought, except this time we're actually going to do something with those thoughts. This episode is all about hitting pause, taking a deep breath and really checking in with yourself, because before we can make meaningful changes, we need clarity. And, let's be real, we all need clarity. So grab a cup of tea, coffee or whatever makes you feel cosy and let's chat about why reflection is so powerful and how it can change your life. So let's get personal for a sec.

Speaker 1:

Last year, I hit a point of complete overwhelm. You know those times where you feel like you're juggling a hundred things and somehow none of them are actually getting done. That's what my life was like social commitments, family obligations. I felt like I was drowning in it all. I knew something had to change, but I had no idea where to start. So I did something I hadn't done in a really long time. I took a weekend just for me. No plans, no distractions, just me, my journal, some chocolate and my dogs. This time of reflection was a game changer for me. It helped me identify what was working in my life, what wasn't working and what needed to shift. And here's the key.

Speaker 1:

Reflection isn't just about fixing problems. It's about creating balance by looking at everything, and I mean the good, the bad and everything in between. Only when we have that insight into what is really happening in our life can we then decide what to dial up, what to dial down and what to let go of entirely. Dial up, what to dial down and what to let go of entirely. We move through our days in action mode, right, we wake up, check our phones, rush through our morning routine, tackle work responsibilities, squeeze in social interactions, all the while mentally running through a never-ending to-do list. We push through the day on autopilot, barely pausing to take a breath, until we finally collapse into bed exhausted. But when we do we actually. But when we actually stop and reflect, it's in those moments of reflection that we gain real insight into our daily lives, how we spend our time, what drains our energy, what truly supports our well-being and what areas need a little more love and attention. So taking even just a few minutes each day to reflect can create massive shifts. Whether it's journaling, meditating or simply sitting in silence with your thoughts, make time for yourself.

Speaker 1:

Reflection can offer clarity, peace and a sense of purpose that extends into every aspect of your life. So why is reflection so powerful? Because often we get caught up in focusing solely on what is going wrong. We spiral into thinking about what's causing us stress, what needs to change and what we're failing at. But reflection isn't just about identifying problems. It's about acknowledging what's working too. Sometimes life's little wins are just as important as the big ones.

Speaker 1:

And reflecting on your life is essential because it provides clarity, promotes self-awareness and helps you make intentional choices. So here's why taking time to reflect can be a total game changer. It can boost your self-awareness, help you recognise patterns in your life, both good and bad, so you can make intentional choices instead of running on autopilot. It helps you learn from experiences. We don't want to keep making the same mistakes right. Reflection helps us absorb lessons so we can grow and improve that word clarity again.

Speaker 1:

But life can feel like a cluttered inbox sometimes. Reflection is like hitting that sort by priority button. It brings focus to what actually matters. It can reduce stress. Just writing things down and acknowledging them actually makes problems feel more manageable. It's like taking all the mental clutter and dumping it onto paper so you can just breathe again, appreciate what is working.

Speaker 1:

Too often we fixate on problems and overlook the good stuff. Reflection helps you recognise that life isn't all bad. There's always something to be grateful for, even on the tough days. It encourages growth. Reflection is a gentle way of holding yourself accountable, nudging yourself towards positive change without the pressure of perfection. It creates purpose. Knowing what's working and what brings you joy helps you identify what truly matters, giving your life more direction and meaning. It also helps you to let go Letting go of what no longer serves you, whether it's a toxic habit, an out-of-date belief or an unnecessary obligation. This can be incredibly freeing and also it helps to build resilience. Looking back at past challenges shows you how far you've come and reinforces your ability to navigate life's ups and downs. Now let's make this personal.

Speaker 1:

Here are some reflection questions that I asked myself over that very, very peaceful weekend. So I asked myself what is going well in my life, and these can be the smallest of things, honestly. One of mine was that I had a good night-time skin routine. I also took daily walks in nature, though sometimes with four dogs it feels more like a survival sport than a peaceful stroll, but it is still one of the highlights of my day. I also asked myself what's not going well, and when I did this, this question, I was surprised that my list wasn't huge. But the key is being specific, instead of just saying I'm not being productive enough. I asked why, and one of those reasons was that my phone is a major distraction, and we all do doom scolding, don't we? But it's about getting specific about what's not going well.

Speaker 1:

I also asked myself what's causing me stress. Again, this list wasn't huge, but writing it down helped me. I got specific, identifying the actual stressor instead of generalizing. So one of my stresses at the time was my dad, but I realized that it wasn't my dad per se that was causing stress, but rather the feeling of me always having to be on call in case he had had a fall. And so it's this situation, and not the person, and that really helped me to understand where some of this stress was coming from.

Speaker 1:

I also asked myself what brings me joy. Now I identified all the little things that makes life brighter. It wasn't just the big things, not just like the big planned events like going on holiday or going to a party, but it was also the tiny joys, like my morning coffee in the morning when no one else is around, a long soak in the bath on a Sunday night and a cuddle with my dogs. Cuddle with my dogs it was what are those little key moments in my day that make me smile. I also asked what energises me. So think about what leaves you feeling refreshed rather than drained.

Speaker 1:

So for me it was yoga, taking an actual lunch break instead of eating on the go and giving myself a buffer time before bed. That that was a really key one for me, because I would work really, really late and then check my phone, do my night routine and go straight to bed, and I was still hyper. My body hadn't had time to relax, so just giving myself an hour before straight to bed, and I was still hyper. My body hadn't had time to relax, so just giving myself an hour before going to bed was what energised me and helped me to sleep better, but also what drains me, and this can be people, habits, routines or chores, and for me it included endless Zoom calls and also saying yes to things out of guilt instead of genuine interest. And when you take the time to reflect on both the good and the bad, you start to see patterns like how that morning coffee with no one else around was so important to me. You can recognise the habits, the routines and the commitments that are adding value to your life and the ones that are quietly dragging you down.

Speaker 1:

Reflection gives you the insight you need to make intentional change, and without it, we often react to life rather than truly live in it, often react to life rather than truly live in it. Now I knew I needed the whole weekend to truly immerse myself in the experience, to step away from the usual distractions and let my thoughts unfold. Naturally, I kept things simple no schedule, no obligations, just time for me, no obligations, just time for me. My phone was on silent. My to-do list I didn't have one. I didn't overthink it. I created the space and let reflection happen. I found quiet pockets of time and different environments that helped me shift my perspective. One moment I'll be curled up in my favourite chair with my journal the next sitting outside, pretending to be one of those people. That journal in nature, but I opted to write in a notebook, notebook and pen, because writing by hand feels more personal to me. But, honestly, you can use whatever works your phone, a tablet, even voice notes Just make sure it's something portable, because changing my surroundings really, really helped, as different spaces sparked new thoughts and insights, and I wouldn't. And the biggest thing was I was not stuck behind a computer trying to do this. So now it's. I'm gonna. This is the task for you. Okay. Now, if you can't set aside a whole weekend, that's okay. Just carve out, maybe even 30 minutes today, tomorrow, this week, whenever you can.

Speaker 1:

The key is to create a little space for yourself, away from distractions, where you can pause and just reflect. Find somewhere quiet, or the quietest place you can find. Grab a notebook and ask yourself these questions what is going well in my life? Take a moment to recognise the little wins, the daily positive habits, the things that make you feel good. Sometimes even small victories like drinking enough water or getting out for fresh air, deserves acknowledgement. Then ask yourself what's not going well. Be specific. If something feels off, try and pinpoint what it is, instead of saying I feel overwhelmed. Dig a little deeper. What is at the root of that feeling? What's causing you stress? Identifying stresses is the first step in figuring out how to manage them. Maybe it's an overflowing inbox, a never-ending to-do list, or just feeling like there is never enough time in the day. What brings you joy? Now, this one is so important, and do you know what? There are so many people that I ask this question to and they have no idea what brings them joy.

Speaker 1:

Think about what truly lights you up, what puts a smile on your face. It could be morning coffee and peace, a great book or dancing in your kitchen like nobody is watching. Then think about what energises you Pay attention to, the activities, routines that leave you feeling refreshed. Maybe it's a great workout, an inspiring conversation or simply getting enough sleep. Then look at what drains you. This could be anything from certain tasks, obligations or even people. The more you notice these patterns, the more you can adjust to protect your energy.

Speaker 1:

Now, with reflection, the goal isn't to solve anything. You don't need to take action yet, just observe. Let the answers come without judgment. From there, you'll start to see what you might want to shift and what's already working for you. So take your time, reflect. I cannot stress how much this is so important and how most people, when they're feeling overwhelmed, never take this time to really understand what's going on, what's going on in their life, what's going on inside, what their mind is doing, what their body is doing. So do it. I really, really recommend it.

Speaker 1:

So that is the action for this week, but in our next episode, we'll dive into the second part of reflect and refrain. And it's time to take those aha moments from some of the stuff that you've reflected on and give them a mindset makeover. Think of it like Marie Kondo-ing your thoughts. We'll chat about how to spot and squash those pesky limiting beliefs that hold you back. And don't worry, it won't feel like homework, it will feel like you're unlocking your superpower. So if you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, share it with a friend or leave a review. You can also connect with me on social media my Instagram handle is Claire4Living and let me know how your reflection process goes. I'd love to hear from you. Until next time, take care of yourself and remember the journey to your best self starts with one small step and maybe a really good cup of coffee with no distractions.