Me, Myself & My Best-Self

Well-being Decoded: The Dance between Hedonic and Eudaimonic Happiness

• Claire Bennett

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Ever wondered how happiness works? Are you trapped on the hedonic treadmill, ceaselessly chasing fleeting pleasures, or are you pursuing a life of purpose and virtue with eudaimonic well-being? Today, we're embarking on a thought-provoking exploration of these two fascinating theories of well-being. We'll unravel the mysteries of living a meaningful life filled with self-awareness, meaningful goals, and positive relationships, compare it with a pleasure-centric existence, and discuss how finding a balance between the two can lead to a happier, healthier life. 

But that's not all! We're also opening up a new chapter in our podcast journey and we want you to be a part of it. Got a burning question or a fascinating topic you'd love to hear us discuss? Maybe you have a personal story that you'd like to share with our community? We're all ears. Reach out and connect with us on social media or drop us an email. Remember, this is a journey of self-discovery, not a quest for perfection. Stay curious, keep wandering, and let's continue this incredible journey of personal growth together.

Speaker 1:

Hey there, curious minds and self improvement dabblers. Welcome to me, myself and my best self. The podcast where we casually navigate the maze of personal growth without the hype. No promises of overnight transformations or grand life revelations here, just real talk, relatable stories and a few laughs as we figure out this whole becoming our best selves thing. I'm Claire Bennett, your guide through the maze of life's quirks and challenges. Let's wonder through it together. No pressure, no perfection, just a touch of curiosity. So welcome back.

Speaker 1:

Episode two is here and I've decided to embrace my nerdiness this week by diving into some psychology theories of well-being. Don't worry, I'll keep it light but informative. So in the vast world of well-being, two main theories take the spotlight hedonic and eudaimonic. It's like a dance between chasing pleasure hedonic and searching for meaning eudaimonic. Let's talk about them in a way that won't put you to sleep, I promise. So hedonic well-being is known as the pursuit of happiness, chasing those moments that bring instant joy and gratification. On the flip side, eudaimonic well-being is about finding fulfillment through deeper connections to values and virtues. Okay, so let's start with eudaimonic well-being. Achieving eudaimonia, or human flourishing, involves living and virtuous and meaningful life. It was first suggested by the philosopher Aristotle. This theory is one that is not as well understood, but I like to look at this one as your guiding principles to life. It's a long-term strategy and you're not necessarily going to see instant results, but over time it will definitely reap the benefits.

Speaker 1:

Pursuing eudaimonic well-being involves living a life that is virtuous, meaning morally good, and involve characteristics such as courage, wisdom, justice, temperance and compassion. Now, virtuous, obviously there's different characteristics depending on different religions, different cultures, but this one is about understanding your own virtues and living by them. It also involves getting to know yourself, so your strengths, your weaknesses, your values, your passions, and this self-reflection needs to be a journey of continuous learning. So, like anything, we change with time, we change with experience, we change with context. So it's about really getting to know who you are in every situation, the good and the bad Goal, time again, not just any goals, though. These are the big, meaningful ones that make your heart do a happy dance, and it's about identifying them, committing to them and chasing them like you're trying to pursue your favourite snack. You also need to invest in positive connections and relationships, like you're building a dream team for life's world ride. These are the relationships that are built on trust, honesty, mutual commitment. But also there's actually been some more research out lately about relationships and how you can beat loneliness, and one of those things is that it's not just about having social interactions but it's about having those positive social interactions and an ongoing basis and on a daily basis.

Speaker 1:

Also, live mindfully, regularly checking to your actions, your motivations and reactions. It's like having a built-in compass that keeps you heading in the right direction. So I'm noticing when you react to certain things. For me I did this at the beginning of the year I used to hate it when you're driving along and you pull over to let someone pass and they don't say thank you. It used to drive me insane and then I realized actually this is my problem, not necessarily theirs, but it's made driving a little bit better for me because I'm not angry every time someone doesn't say thank you and I do a nice thing Also.

Speaker 1:

Reason. The next one is reason and critical thinking are your sidekick. So make choices that make sense and align with your values and your long-term goals. One of my favorites never stop the curiosity train. So keep learning, keep reflecting and I'm locking deeper insights into yourself and the world and embrace challenges. Yes, bring them on. View those hurdles as opportunities to flex your super well-being muscles. Overcoming difficulties is like discovering your own superpowers, and it builds resilience. Without challenges, we don't become resilient. So that's eutomonic well-being.

Speaker 1:

So now let's move on to hedonic well-being. Now, this is often seen as the fun one, the one that most of us seek. Living hedonically involves seeking pleasure, maximizing positive experiences and avoiding pain. Now, a hedonic well-being does get a bad rap and is the pursuit that can lead to too much of a good thing. You also have the concept of the hedonic treadmill.

Speaker 1:

This is when, in general, people have a baseline of happiness and that they return to this baseline no matter what happens in their life. So, for example, you buy a new car, you eat a delicious meal or you get that promotion, or even you win the lottery. The novelty soon wears off and people return to that typical level of happiness, and this has been shown time and time again. So if we all have a typical level of happiness or well-being, then what is the point of pursuing something when we are likely to fall back to our norm? But there is some good news. According to research, 40% of our happiness is within our control. Now, that 40% differs in terms of what you look at, but it's around 40%. 50% is to do with your basically your genetics, and 10% of it is about your context, so where you were born, where you live, who your parents are. But 40% is still a big number to be able to have within your control.

Speaker 1:

And if we just let a hadonic life, although it could be fun, it does have its pitfalls. So constant pursuit of pleasure without balance can result in burnout or lead to addictive behaviors, whether substance related or otherwise, and this impacts both physical and mental health. It may foster fleeting relationships. So focusing on immediate enjoyment rather those deeper connections. So, as said before, the research does show that it's not just about having lots of social interactions, it's about having those interactions that are meaningful.

Speaker 1:

Overspending on immediate gratifications may have long-term financial repercussions and could cause stress. Hey look, we've all done it gone out, bought that dress, need the shoes, need the handbag. But that gratification only lasts for so long. Hadonic pleasures may offer temporary satisfaction but often lack deeper fulfillment and purpose, and this could result in mood fluctuations based on external factors. On the flip side, living a wholly eudaimonic life while fulfilling comes with its own set of challenges, so it might lead to rigidity. Staying true to your values and chasing long-term goals might make you a bit too structured.

Speaker 1:

Occasional FOMO. Making choices for the greater good can leave you yearning for immediate joy and that feeling of missing out, and it can also put a restraining on relationships. So it's all about finding that balance to personal aspirations and growth and being the friend and partner or family member and you want, all you're meant to be. So, when you look at this, there's eutomonic and hedonic and there's good and bad on both. So what's the magic formula? Well, it is all about balance and here are some suggestions.

Speaker 1:

So identify those pleasurable activities, reflect on what brings you joy and make time for those activities. So always that delay in gratification is not always a good thing. You need to be able to just go and have some fun, let your hair down and prioritize self-care. So take care of your physical and mental wellbeing and see that as a positive activity. So find something you love to do that helps your physical or your mental wellbeing. Build positive relationships, cultivate meaningful connections with others, indulge in enjoyable experiences. Let yourself enjoy them. So be mindful, practice being fully engaged and enjoy the activities. So if you're gonna have that lovely three-course meal, then enjoy every single bite and let yourself enjoy it without feeling guilty the day after because your goal is to lose weight or this and the other. Enjoy it guilt-free. Balance hedonism with responsibility. So balance the two.

Speaker 1:

Enjoy in the moment, but keep long-term goals in mind. So, for example, if you're gonna go have a day off from chasing your goals or have two days off, have a week off, but come back to it as regenerated and feeling like you can then carry on. Cultivate positive emotions. Focus on gratitude, joy and contempt. Gratitude is one that gets lots of good rap. Think about what you're thankful for every day. Avoid excessive behavior. So moderation is a key to a healthy lifestyle. Incorporate playfulness. Remember when you're a kid. You just use to giggle at the funniest things. If you go back, think what you used to enjoy as a kid and maybe start to add those things into your life. Dance around the kitchen to your favorite music or infuse some playfulness into your daily life and celebrate achievements. Acknowledge and celebrate your successes. So, as you're going through these like I think I mentioned this last week but as you're setting goals and going through them, celebrate the small wins.

Speaker 1:

It's not all about that big destination and people, especially now. At the moment, everyone keeps talking about having a more balanced life. They want to feel more balanced in their home and their work and all of this. And I really think they're referring a balance between this hedonic and new demonic, rather than a balance between life and work and family and all of those other things money. I actually think that hedonic and new demonic when you kind of get that balance right, then you are living, then sorry, you're having a balance of both pursuits of well-being that can result in a life well-lived. I'm not sure a 50-50 balance of hedonic and new demonic is probably right for me. Maybe in my 20s a 50-50 split might have been about right and maybe it was more hedonic than new demonic. But for me now I think an 80s 20 split new demonic being the 80 is a really good balance for me. And people think, oh, 80-20, but that's in a week that's kind of a whole day to be hedonic and the rest new demonic. But it's about, I think, mixing it up. So having that dessert with that dinner, having that hour to myself for self-care every day, so yeah, I think it's about that, I think this when people talk about balanced life, it's about getting this balance right, and it's going to be a different balance for everyone at different times of your life.

Speaker 1:

Like I'll be honest, this weekend I probably enjoyed a more hedonic experience. I went away for the weekend to Brighton. For those of you that don't know Brighton, it's a great place to have a good time. To put it in context, it is a firm favourite with Henan Stagtoos. Although there weren't too many there in November.

Speaker 1:

I probably no, not probably I definitely ate and drank too much, danced till my feet hurt and definitely slept to too little, but it still had elements of eudaimonic wellbeing. Well, I'm going to try and infuse them. But I travelled with two of my best friends. We've been friends for over 30 years and spending time with them is always meaningful. I was also mindful and present. I enjoyed every moment, and I think that I enjoyed it more because I don't get to do it every weekend, so I savoured the experience. Definitely, in my 20s, when I was out four days out of seven, I probably didn't enjoy it as much as having that one weekend every few months to go away, and I'm so grateful for the weekend experience, despite the slight hangover. But great weekend, and now it's probably back to taking care of my body, because it definitely takes me longer to get over them.

Speaker 1:

But on that note, my fellow wanderers, it brings us to the end of episode two. We've demystified the dance between hedonic and eudaimonic wellbeing, discovering the joys and pitfalls of each. Whether you're grooving to the thrill of pleasure or walks into the depth of meaning, the magic lies in finding your balance. So here's the golden ticket Identify what brings you joy, prioritise self-care, build positive connections and embrace the joyful moments. Blend hedonism with responsibility, infuse playfulness and celebrate your victories, big or small. Life is a dance and your rhythm is uniquely yours.

Speaker 1:

Now I'd love to hear from you what topics do you want us to explore in the future episodes? Do you have any personal stories or experiences you'd like to share on the podcast? Whether it's a success story, a learning moment or just a funny anecdote, I'm all ears. You can connect with me on Instagram and Facebook at ClaireFallLiving, or send me an email at hello at ClaireBennettcom. Don't be shy. Let's make this a two-way conversation. After all, we're on this journey of self-discovery together. As we wrap up, remember it's not about perfection, it's about the journey. Keep wandering, stay curious and until next time, this is Claire Bennett singing off, signing off from me myself and my best self. Happy exploring.